Author: sojonee33

It’s been a while since I took a moment to reflect or chat with you. Honestly it hasn’t been because I haven’t had anything to say, it was more that I was waiting for the release to say what I needed to say at the appropriate time. When I started blogging two years ago, it was so that I could connect with others during the lock-In of the pandemic and we could release our frustrations discussing varying topics.
What I got week after week was private messages about the subject matters and how it may have helped, and I even blogged one week about “shared experiences”. It was powerful. This was evolving into something more and I was not sure if I wanted to take on that role or if I had the band width to do so.
Life got really busy, I switched jobs, became a Deacon, got more involved in other ventures and the excuses started to pile up. I couldn’t find the time to sit and chat for a few minutes because I had a “designated period” in which I would like to do it. Then I turned 50 and had a most wonderful prayer encounter with God that was both reflective and prophetic and realized it was time to get back to it. My encounters this week surrounding my birthday only confirmed it.
Prayer is powerful. It really does change things. It is not enough to just speak the words out loud or to yourself, you have to believe it in your heart. My petitions to God over the years have come from places of hurt, anticipation, expectation, joy, faith and SINCERITY. I not only believe he can do a thing; I stand in expectation that he will. I also know that it does not always work out the way that I WANT, but it always works out for the best.
Last night I went to dinner with my best friend/brother. We were talking about a prayer he had prayed when he spoke about how God will tell you, yes, no or wait. That led to a bigger conversation about obedience and I reiterated to him a conversation I had just had with our Pastor earlier that day.
Twenty plus years ago, I had my pickings for a job in Human Resources. Five offers were made. One of them was a lateral move from where I was planning on leaving a bit out of the way in distance. I never really considered them in my mind. Two of them were great for where I stood in my life at that time and even today. I laid out the offers, prayed and asked God to show me where to go. The next morning, clear as a verbal voice, he gave me the one that I didn’t want. I thought I was hearing things. I pushed back and it was clear again. Take the job where there was no pay increase, no real excitement and I had further to commute. Sidebar, I was not a fan of working in NYC and this was in the heart of it.
I took the job and hated every moment of the actual job. At 29 years old I suffered a heart attack at my desk. Never in my life had I experienced workplace bullying however that is exactly what I got there as well. 98% of the people HATED me. Why did God send me there? I met a man; he became my forever. By far outweighing anything that was said or done. He needed me and I needed him. Neither of us knew it at the time, BUT GOD.
Obedience… our second prophetic encounter at my church was happening and we were all excited. It usually took place on a Friday night. One of my bonus children had been in the ICU for close to 30 days and I was not seeing much of my husband during that time. The night of the prophetic he wanted to take a break not knowing I made plans to go to the encounter. I knew he needed me and I also knew I needed to be in church. I could not be in 2 places or 2 states at the same time. I painfully told him I would see him afterwards knowing it could be weeks before we would have time like that again.
The NEXT MORNING, our daughter was released from the ICU. I was able to spend the afternoon with him and visit her at the same time. God will always make a way when we prioritize and put him first.
I have hundreds of testimonies where I can SHOW YOU how God has shown up. Is it because I’m special? Not really. I think I am but not anymore than anyone else that may be reading this. The key to unlocking the favor of God is not a huge secret. It’s really quite simple.
I am a flawed individual. I make mistakes and do not always act in accordance to a Christian life. I have a heart to serve and will always love my neighbors as I love myself, something we forget to do. Love is the key. My love for people is genuine and heartfelt, even when they do me wrong.
I said my petitions to God include hurt. People will test your very last nerve. Take it to God and leave it there. Don’t let it harden your heart and close you off from loving others. My inner circle is smaller than most think because my love is wide open for the masses. Everyone feels like they are my best friend.
Be encouraged today. Keep praying. Pray with sincerity and an open heart. Be prepared for God to send you in a different direction than where you want to go. TRUST that HE knows BETTER than YOU!
Be Blessed.
Until Next Time, whenever that may be.
Love you all!

“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.

It’s been a while since I had something to say. When I started blogging my intention was always to make sure that the content of what I blogged about was from the heart and relevant, and not just a bunch of words to pass the time and meet a quota. Truthfully speaking I wake up all the time wondering if there is something I want to share and lately I’ve hit a brick wall.

Until this weekend. Feelings started to rush through me like a tsunami when I scrolled through my social media and read some of the status updates on the excitement of the 3-day weekend and “holiday” that many people have off while others were upset that they still had to work.

I’m very vocal about how I feel about commercialized holidays. I loathe the “celebration” of a thing that many people don’t understand nor do they care about trying to find the true meaning of.   Full transparency, I participate in several for the greater good of others however in MY house, there is true awareness behind all of these man-made holidays so that true context can be taught and as we gather together, we know of the sacrifices for our “freedoms” and “privileges”.

On a basic level, I don’t like seeing phony post about Veterans Day and Memorial Day when half of the people posting don’t know the difference between the two. People who served and died while serving are honored on Memorial Day.  My sister, dad, brother, grandfather etc. and so on who served would be honored on Veteran’s Day. Yet we post pics of them on both just to show how “woke” and connected we are to loving our country and those that served.

I love Thanksgiving. I love the time with my family, the idea of giving back and being of service to those that are less fortunate. That unfortunately is not the true meaning of where Thanksgiving originates from and maybe is the only holiday, I’m grateful there was a pivot to something better. The truth cannot get lost in reset and commercialization. We are bound to repeat history if we do not learn from our past mistakes.

Christmas is not about the gift giving. It’s not big trees and Santa Claus. Jesus was not born on December 25^th. The holiday season in itself takes about six weeks from start to finish. What it actual produces is debt, anxiety, loneliness, grief, depression, heartache and so on. Sure, it is the “most wonderful time of the year” for some however for many it is quite the opposite. The pressure to produce or be present is overwhelming, does that align with the love of Christ who is the reason for the season?

I’m so anti-Valentine’s Day it’s not even funny. The history of St. Valentines originated with the Christian Church and had nothing to do with romance at all. It was martyrdom. Someone saw an opportunity to capitalize and make money and boy did they ever. I love love, I want love every day and expect such. The idea of big gesture love for the rest of the world to see how much you love me does not impress me at all. I’ve been this way my whole life. Sometimes my husband listens, sometimes he doesn’t. February 14^th means NOTHING to me. I was this way long before he met me.

That brings me back to my original rant. Dr. King sacrificed his life in pursuit of equality and justice for all people. As a young adult, MLK Day meant a day of serving/learning/advancing or growing. We are far from where he envisioned us to be and thankfully not quite where he left us.

We all get caught up in the holidays (holi-craze). Before Thanksgiving is even over, Christmas decorations are out. The day after Christmas, we see Valentine’s decorations. Do not get distracted by the shiny nickel that is placed in front of you and believe that all is well. Literally.

A new holiday has been added. Juneteenth. We are still fighting for equal justice and voting rights. Student debts that disproportionally affect black and brown people. Home appraisals that undervalue the sales of our homes and keep the wealth gap wide.

This is MY RANT. I back up my rant with actions. I get involved and make sure my voice is heard, LOUD AND CLEAR. What will you do?

Holidays can be fun. They can bring you closer to your family and your loved ones. Enjoy them. Celebrate them. I just encourage you to take the time to know what it is you are “celebrating” and why. Having Maya Angelou on a quarter is great, but what about all the years of lost wages and reparations?

Have a most wonderful afternoon and educate yourself!

Love you all!

Have you ever intended to do something and you never quite got around to doing it? Or maybe when you did it didn’t have the same impact as to when you thought about it? Perhaps you missed the mark altogether. Life is full of wishful intentions however if we act too slow or not at all, the consequences can be great.

This week I have more questions for you than prior weeks. I really want to help somebody.  As we approach the end of the year, many people go into reflective mode and start to plan out next year’s agenda when we have time this year to get things off the ground. Why are you skipping ahead?

You know that nagging feeling you get to call someone and you put it off? Maybe you finally call them or maybe you don’t. Did that person get sick or worse die? How did that make you feel? Calls and/or text messages literally take minutes to generate.

What about the friendly dentist? That little pain in your tooth gets ignored for how long until it turns into an infection or an abscess. What started out as minor work now has ballooned into thousands of dollars and unnecessary pain.

You ask a friend for assistance on resources that could help launch your own business. Perhaps it is a mentor, a vendor or loan officer. You don’t call that person for months. When you finally do, you find out they no longer work for the company you were calling. Now you are feeling discouraged and you lay your dreams to the side.

We always find time to do things we want to do. That’s a fact. No matter how busy we are if every second of our calendar is filled up, and we are single and we meet the right one, all of a sudden, we have time. We have so much time it is super scary to think how busy we used to be.

Let me leave you with this. Many years ago, I resigned from a job because I had just gotten married and was living in New York. The job was in South Jersey and I didn’t have a car, I was using my husbands. I would stay at my mother’s house in New Jersey several days a week to avoid the George Washington Bridge traffic which was brutal and I suffered from migraines.

On my last day, I was at my mother’s house, rushing to get to the office. I didn’t really want to however I knew I had to. I ran out the house and rushed into the car. When I got in the car, I realized in my haste, I had forgotten to pray. HUH? I sat in the car before puling off and said my morning prayers. My mom, was in the window looking at me and called my cell phone to make sure I was ok. (I suffered from terrible migraines).  I hit the road and about 20 minutes into my commute was exiting one highway when the car hydroplaned on a bed of leaves causing it to spin multiple times and land over the edge of the parkway.

The vehicle was totaled. The entire front end was smashed up like an accordion and both of my legs should have been crushed. The airbag never deployed and I was later told if it had it would have been more dangerous given the impact of the crash. The driver’s door was smashed in, they used the jaws to get me out. I stepped out of the car without a scratch, or a headache. I KNOW it was because I pray everyday and almost forgot and rectified that before I drove off.

That morning, my wishful intention saved my life. I didn’t put off until tomorrow what I needed to do in the RIGHT NOW! Maybe that is a bit dramatic albeit true but I think you get the point. Opportunities are aplenty. Return those phones, answer those emails. Don’t let your dreams die because you think you are too busy. There is always room on the agenda to see about yourself, until there isn’t!

I love you all!

Have an amazing weekend!

Until next time!

We are in the fourth quarter stretch. This is the last quarter before the end of the year. For me, this is a true transitional period that if feels like that tale of two years. 2021 has certainly shown that you can never really settle for what you think is ahead of you. If you are an individual like myself, one who puts their hope in faith in God, then you can always expect the unexpected.

When I started out in the first quarter, I was deeply depressed trying to find a way to process through my grief. The end of 2020 I had been dealt with finding out 13 people died in an 11-day span. It was overwhelming, I took an eight-week sabbatical to deal with my grief that bridged into the year 2021.

When I returned, I was determined to put one foot in front of the other and make the most of life. I literally declared it was my “season” and I would be intention in spending more time in prayer, mediation, and in the presence of God. First quarter, it worked, I earned myself a prestigious award with a 1% chance of winning and a magazine cover to go with.

I didn’t stop there. When the season changed from spring to summer, I dug in. I stepped up my efforts to help those around me and found a level of success in doing so. I also decided it may be time to make moves for myself and opened up for opportunities to be presented in which I was able to sift through and make a choice. I enrolled in ministerial training to progress that call that has been on my life officially.

Here we are. Fall has entered the room. As of yesterday, my season at my current job came to a close. It was bittersweet in that I imagined I would retire from there. The experiences I have gained and relationships I have fostered have prepared me for the next steps. I will be starting a dream job that was literally created just for me. Tomorrow I get ordained as a deaconess to publicly cement my commitment to serve. So much more is happening but that can be discussed later.

What am I trying to say? Seasonal changes happen whether we want them to or not. What we do in our own lives can make our seasons thrive or be stagnant. When summer changes to fall, the leaves began to blossom on the trees in full bloom with beautiful magnificent colors. Mosquitos disappear and the days get shorter. When winter rolls around, the leaves fall off the trees and the air get brisk so that snow can fall and settle in.  When spring comes, the days warm up, the sun stays out longer and the earth gets water with the necessary rain to keep the cycle going.

Life happens no matter what we do. It’s up to us what we choose to do with it.

Don’t let your “season’ be a dry season!

Until next time!

I love you all!

Last night in another totally random conversation with my other half, he jokingly told me it was too late in the evening to break out the dictionary. We were conversing about the affairs of the world and I get extremely passionate at times. In my heightened frustration, I began to use particular words to describe certain situations to match my displeasure. It was 2 a.m. and I became a walking thesaurus. It’s a running joke amongst my kids.

That led us to talking about something I used to do at the peak of the recent election cycle. A word of the day. I would choose a word relative to politics and post the definition so that those who were blind to what was going on could truly understand what was happening.

There is a word that has been popping up a lot this week in conversation.  Complacent. To be complacent means to be satisfied with conditions or too comfortable to complain or make a fuss. If I were complacent, I would not be here today in my career or my relationship.

I truly believe the best way to help people is to be fully vulnerable and transparent. We cannot move forward in this world in which we are content with the way things are thinking they will never touch us personally. Take the pandemic as an example. It affected everybody. Now we are in a phase where arguments are being made to be vaccinated or not to vaccinate. This is a global health crisis. I’m not here to tell anyone what to do. I want to pose a scenario on why things cannot go back to normal while this debate rages on.

As long as the virus is out there, it will continue to spread. That is a fact. You may be vaccinated and you may get a booster and life may serve you well.  Let’s say you are shopping for a luxury vehicle or need a particular windshield for your car to be replaced. Supply and demand. There is a shortage of supplies due to this crisis and where the manufacturer originates from. Healthcare workers are stretched thin. Basic medical needs like broken bones and emergent services are being turned away already in 2 states because there are not enough beds. If someone you love cannot be treated for a heart attack, how would you feel?  Nothing to worry about right, that will never happen here…. Complacent.

In my career, I saw a problem and it bothered me. I spoke up. I never imagined it would take me on the road that it did however it opened up many doors and allowed me to speak up even more when I saw things that I was not comfortable with. That led me to a place where I can have a bigger effect and be proud that I was not complacent. I spoke out. Even if some of the issues didn’t touch me personally, I needed to let those that were in power hear that I was watching for whatever that was worth. It paid off. Everyone has a voice that can be used for making a difference somewhere.

We see African Americans in positions just because they are African Americans. Pulled over by the police, followed by store clerks, harassed by neighbors, given low home appraisals, passed over for jobs and the list goes on. Are you in a place where you can support or intercede or do you walk by and say “that’s not my business’? Can you imagine if it was happening to you or a member of your family? Would you want that assistance then?

We have to decide it is ok to take a stand. Too many people have a mindset that they do not want to get involved or upset the applecart when sometimes it can begin in your own home. You should never settle when your peace of mind and happiness are at stake. That goes for your job, your marriage, your relationship with your family and your friends!

Take back control of who you are!

Have the most blessed weekend!

Love you all!

I recently asked my sister if I was getting sentimental in my elder years. I’ve always been a little tough to crack emotionally which is a bit of an oxymoron considering my level of love and compassion for those around me. Maybe I felt it was always better to give than to receive or truthfully, I didn’t feel deserving of it for so long.

Life is in this whirlwind where there is so much happening causing calamity and strife all around. We are still in a pandemic, social injustice is still unjust, our economy is tanking, people are dying all around us and everyday something new happens that would normally be shocking but it’s just another thing now. People are mad at the choices we are making over our lives and the protection of our bodies and our families. Violently mad. It’s unbelievable.

Yet, in all of this, I feel love. Lots of it. The kind that is true, pure and can be counted on at all times. I never thought I’d be able to say that before and here I am.  It is coming in from all directions and I am doing my best to accept it and not question the validity of it.

I believe you reap what you sow. I have sown seeds of love and encouragement my entire life. I am “that person” you can call to help you get through a dark situation and feel better about a moment. I see the light where there is darkness even if my own light is dim. What I never took the time to pay attention to was how much my pouring out of love and compassion would be returned to me at just the right time in my life.

I give without the expectation of getting back. The intangibles. My heart, my ear, empathy, compassion and so on. What I have noticed in the past 12 months is that the circle of individuals around me have been openly returning love to me tenfold and it is such a comfort and peace that it bears acknowledgment. They have always loved me, no doubt about that. What I am describing is a universal unspoken collective ramping up display that has sometimes made me cry.

When 2021 began, I was in a sabbatical dealing with an emotional breakdown trying to process grief. As we prepare to enter the 10^th month, I am on an emotional high of elation at the way my life has progressed throughout the year. I didn’t quit, I worked harder and it was the support and love from my family and friends that helped push me through.

I watched my daughter transform into a beautiful adult right before my eyes. Our bond has taken a shift in a way that is natural and it makes my heart glad. Our love and support for one another is as deep as it was the day she was formed in my womb. You can see it. We can feel. It is real love between a parent and child.

I have opened up and shared with my sisters some things about me and plans for the future. We have traded advice and laughed until we cried. I talk with my niece, my nephews and cousins more frequently and express the love I have for them. Some of those conversations go deep and our bonds are sealed in love. That’s love in a family way.

I spend time with my friends. We check in, we talk and text. We share stories to help uplift one another and we laugh until it hurts. Most importantly, we know we can count on each other or support whenever needed. That is real love.

I never talk about my husband. I’m selfish when it comes to him because he is mine. Make no mistake however we are one. That is real love. For 21 years we have laughed, cried and supported one another through everything. NO ONE is closer to me than he is. NO ONE has my back more than he does. NO ONE shows up more for me than he. We found a way to make it work. We know each other as well as we know our selves and he is home. My heart, my everything. I see love when I see him looking at me. I hear love when he talks to me and I feel love in his touch. We don’t pretend every day is a perfect day, we just know that every day is our day and we want tomorrow.

Love is beautiful. Allow yourself to let it in especially now when the world in in chaos. I am in a period of transition and the outpouring of love from colleagues and associates is overwhelming. You never really know the impact you may have on an individual’s life. Let the world give you your flowers now. I have received hundreds of messages this week alone, from work and personal relationships, thanking me for the role I play in their lives.

I thank God that this particular seed I have been sowing, I am happy to reap the harvest of. It feels good!

I LOVE YOU ALL!

Tell someone how you feel about them today.

Kind words don’t cost you anything but your time.

These last couple of weeks of summer have been such a whirlwind of events. I thought my return to the blogging would be something totally different but that is not how this works when you follow the Holy Spirit. We will get into the rest of the hot button topics in the weeks to come and thank you for rocking out with me! I hope that you have enjoyed your time off and found a way to rest and restore!

I try not to talk about 9/11. About September 2^nd or 3^rd, the news starts to saturate us with the images and stories and that fateful day and every time it brings anxiety to those who have lived through it. For varying reasons, that day is seared in our minds and history and will be cemented there with the phrase, “Never Forget”. As if we could. Not that we want to.

I may be alone in my way of thinking but it is hard to “forget” when it is literally re-hashed for a week moment by moment every year. For the last 20 years. When does the healing process begin or is that meant to help heal?

On that Tuesday morning, I had my then, 4-year-old daughter with me. I had taken off the morning from work to go to the social security office and get documentation for her to begin kindergarten. We were standing in line when the first plane hit. I looked out the window and saw the plane in the side of the building and felt immediate dread. My beloved sister worked in one of those two buildings.

My sister was as predictable as a timepiece. There was no doubt in my mind she was already at her desk hard at work. Since the buildings were called the “twin towers” the key was trying to figure out which tower she occupied. I knew she worked at a high floor so the dread hung on me like a cape.

I ran out of the building and tried immediately to make several phone calls. At this time the cell towers were starting to go haywire in some areas. I raced to my mother’s house just in enough time for the second tower to get hit. I immediately lost my head. I became hysterical and my best friend calmed me down by telling me not to worry, if anything, my sister got out because she scaled down the building like spiderman.

That was not exactly how she did it but my friend had a point. If anyone was going to get out, it would be my sister and I’m GRATEFUL to say she survived. Not without emotional scars and physical challenges however she lives to tell her story and that is the best outcome.

Every time we get to this point in the year, I worry about her. I worry about her and those like her who have survived. The ones who walked away from the carnage with those memories impressed in their minds forever and are forced to relive every year.

I think about people like myself. People who were “supposed” to be in the city but made a last-minute detour and decided to do something else. I know I couldn’t have survived the day. Not the actual attack, but the aftermath of having no way home, no subways or buses. I lived in New Jersey and worked in Midtown. There was no way in or out. My boyfriend at the time (now my husband) told me he would have carried me from midtown to the Bronx. I believe him and know he would have. I’m just really glad he didn’t have too.

That day changed all of our lives. Those who lost loved ones deserve to hear their names called out each and every year. They didn’t ask for this. Our first responders are amazing individuals who put the lives of others ahead of their own and in the process lost theirs, their limbs or are suffering with illnesses.

I salute all our heroes and survivors who are just trying to make it through another day! Whatever side of the coin you land on, if this is too much or not enough, my prayers and thoughts are with you. Thank you for being everyday heroes to many. You didn’t ask for this and you are brave, resilient and worthy!

Reach out and check on someone today!

I look forward to catching up with you next week!

Love you all to life,

Sonji

What makes you a good listener? Do you ever really stop and hear what people say or are you constantly interrupting and interjecting yourself into their story? If I had to guess I would say the majority is the latter. We have this need to “one up” each other even when we need to sit quietly and focus.

I’ve been told I’m a great listener. I interject when needed and offer advice as needed. My interjections are for shared experiences and not to gain advantage in the conversation. My goal and purpose are always to uplift, encourage, be transparent and provide hope. There is a reason why we have one mouth and two ears.

Much like the rest of the world I have been taking stock over my life and those in it since we have found ourselves in the midst of a global pandemic. It made me wonder where I want to go in my life and how I can be better. It also made me look at those around me to see if I add any value to them or vice versa.

Our shared experience of the pandemic is enough of a traumatic event to talk about for years to come. We have never been through anything like this before. When we add in our individual stories of lost loved ones, broken relationships, new jobs, new homes, social injustices and so on, it gets a bit complicated.

I was speaking with someone I have a lot of love for and they asked me how have I been. That’s a loaded question. A whole lot had happened since we last had time to really catch up so I began to share some things with them. Ever so often, they interrupted and said, oh my goodness, that happened to ME TOO! No big deal there. We kept talking. I asked them how they have been coping. They talked I listened.  I said a few words here and there and then they asked me a question. It was about something I had just told them but they hadn’t really heard me because they weren’t listening. I reminded them I already told them what happened (no I did not repeat myself) and I moved the conversation along. 

Did I get mad? Was I upset? No. This happens so often and most people don’t even realize they do it. I’m sure I do it too although my reputation is for being better at not doing such a thing. It is human nature and we simply cannot help ourselves.

Here’s why it is important that we try. When someone comes to you and sincerely wants to have a conversation about something, you need to be able to listen and really hear what they are saying. Often times it is what people are not saying that can be troublesome too.

Cries for help are not always screamed out loud. In fact, many people suffer in silence because they believe no one can help them or will understand what they are going through. If I am pouring out my heart to you, instead of matching horror story for horror story, listen to what I am saying, or not saying and probe deeper or go tell someone else.

We are carrying weight that we have never had to carry before. If everyone we talk to is only concerned about the weight, they are carrying every single day, there is no community healing in sight.  I’m not saying we need to be responsible for what someone else is going through, I’m just asking that if they trust you enough to bring an issue to you, don’t shut them down by piling your issues on them. They came to you and initiated the conversation. That has to count for something.

I promised to always be transparent so here is a full disclosure. When I was a teenager, I was on the phone with a friend having what I thought at the time was a pleasant conversation. In hindsight, I know what I missed. We talked for hours and I did not sense that anything was wrong. Later on, that evening, he took his life.

A few years later I found myself in a similar situation. I knew what to do immediately and that life was saved. I am an individual that people confide in and trust with their secrets. It’s a running joke and a heavy gift to bear. If I could help one person, save one other person, I will rest well in my spirit.

If their mouth is moving, your ears should be open. How well do you listen? Can you just let them talk and not became a star in their story?

Please be safe and enjoy your summer!

I will be here throughout the summer as the spirit leads me but back fulltime in September!

I love you all!

When I was growing up, the expression was, “it takes a village”. A village to support you in making sure you stay on track and achieve the goals that were laid out before you. There was the babysitter, the person who walked you to and from school, maybe a tutor, your friends, your family and so on.

Nowadays, that has more significant meaning for me. I’m not a child anymore however the goals that I want to achieve are equally as important as they were when I was in my youth. The people that I have around me are invaluable to my growth and progress and play a huge part in the success I have.

These are individuals I can call on to guide me spiritually, emotionally and impart wisdom whenever I hit a crossroad.  They encourage me, support me, walk with me, talk me through and some even journey with me so that I don’t have to travel the roads alone. Someone is always there to make sure that I am covered.

I realized as I often do, how tired I am in the mental sense. When I sit and ponder why I am mentally tired I break down everything that I have going on. I am involved in a lot of activities and I signed up for most of them myself. Giving so much of yourself is exhaustive and rewarding at the same time. There are constant thoughts on how to improve and make things better.

My village, or team is phenomenal in every area that I am involved in. My gratitude for these individuals run deep because I know the good works that we do together could not be done without the contributions of each specific one and the unique talents that are bought into the cause. Everyone has a role to play.

I have a greater purpose at work. It drains me to sometimes think about how much work we have to do to change the culture. We have been going at it non-stop for a little more than a year. This week, I had to encourage them, and myself, that our hard work will pay off. As a team we are rock solid and we stand firm in our beliefs. Together we have already moved the needle. We must continue to keep our eyes on the bigger picture and press forward.

I am involved in several nonprofits. This week was a busy one for both of them.  In one instance we are preparing for a fundraiser while restructuring and the other had an annual audit. In my brilliance I get a bright idea on how to expand one of our programs and in the midst of a million other things began to do research and call up others to assist me in my thought process while the idea is still fresh. My village.

When I am feeling overwhelmed at work, I call a very specific person to discuss how I should navigate my feelings and recalibrate to center myself again, my mentor. When I need just to laugh, plain and simple, I call my best friend. When I need to hear good sound advice and feel calm, I call my sister. When I need to be checked and get the absolute truth and wisdom, I call my brother. When I need that boost, and to feel loved after getting beat down in the middle of the day, I call my husband.

These calls are interchangeable. My point is that I have a village. People I can call on to help ground me and who always have my back. No matter what a situation looks like, they are there. They show up, they rock with me and they encourage me to keep moving forward in the right direction.

I am fortunate that my village extends far beyond the few that I named. I value those who invest their time with me and see it not robbery to join forces to work along side me and do good in the world. I made a commitment yesterday to become a part of someone’s team in some capacity. I don’t know yet how but I know that I want to because I believe in what they are doing and how they are executing their plan. Results bring reward. The reward is seeing change happen.

No matter what you are doing in life, surround yourself with people that will uplift and support you. Be a support system for someone else. You never know what people are going through and just availing yourself with kind words or a shared laugh can make all of the difference in a day!

Until We Meet Again!

Be Safe Out There!

I love You ALL!!!!

We are all selfish. It is in our nature. We want things to happen for us, to us and to be our way every time. There are times we commit selfless acts however overall, when it boils down to what we really want and need, it is all about me, me, me.

I talk about this a lot with my husband. The selfish nature of the human. No matter what you do and how much you give of yourself, someone always wants more than you have. In the instance where you simply cannot come through, you become the bad guy. There are many ways to break down the word selfish. I want to go with concentrating on one’s own pleasure, advantage or well-being without regard for the others.

I suffer from an auto-immune disease. It’s not a secret and those that know and love me are quite familiar with the challenges that comes along with it. There are days I can be myself and do whatever and there are some when I can barely make it out of the bed.  This week, I had a flare-up. I made my challenges known because I had committed to do several things through-out the week.

Two individuals I made commitments to heard what was wrong and immediately gave me release from our engagements. One I accepted and the other I forged ahead on. A third individual wanted to keep me on the phone discussing their issue, even after I told them how talking made me feel, because it was important to them. Their situation was not life or death. I had said I would review something with them and I am woman of my word. Was I wrong to think they were being selfish and we could talk later?

You owe me money. Before you borrowed it, we spoke pretty regularly. Now I can’t seem to get you on the phone and when I do you seem distant and rushed and almost angry like I did something to you. Once you pay me back things go back to normal. I decide I will put distance between us because of how you acted the last time and I tell you. You get upset and say I am overreacting. Your defense is that you had a lot going on and don’t want to mess things up with me. Is it me or accessibility to my funds?

My husband and I toss back an interesting view when we “disagree”.   He says we’re both selfish looking for resolutions to our disagreements because if one doesn’t get it their way, the other is getting it for themselves. There is never really a true compromise. Someone always has to concede a little bit more than the other.

I never wanted to think of myself as a selfish individual. The fact of the matter is, I am. I can break down all of the selfish ways that I have but they are personal. 😊 What is important is I am working to balance my selfishness with a greater level of selflessness. When I can do more and be better, I let the light within me shine brighter. It is not always something I set out to do intentionally, I believe I have enough goodness in me that being selfless comes naturally.

We are living in a time when our leaders are as corrupt as they have ever been. Their only goal is to maintain power and privilege above the will of the people. Selfish. Corporations are going through reckonings and seeing employees reimagine themselves in better positions and roles that they have long been qualified for and deserve to hold. Senior members are trying to figure out ways to “make room” for them while maintaining their positions. Selfish. The healthcare industry is undergoing an overhaul where Black and Brown innovators are now being asked to come to the forefront to help quelch a pandemic when it has been those same innovators behind the scenes for years helping to make cures to save lives. Selfish.  Everywhere we turn there are selfish acts being committed. Globally and surely right in your own personal lives. It is a guarantee that you were involved in a selfish act within the past 24 hours.

The question is, how selfish are YOU? How is your selfishness impacting the world around you?

 Philippians 2:4 “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others”.

Until Next Time….

Commit a Selfless Act!

Be Safe and Keep Cool!

Love You ALL!